Assault with a Deadly Woman

Hello Minions.
This being mine and Allen's first blog, we were in mid conversation on women and how they are easily manipulated. So I decided it'd be a good first topic.
Now I'm not using "Ho" as a whorish term, I'm using it as a label for "those kinda girls". Once you read you'll catch my drift.

"Ho"
n. pl. hos
slang; A Prostitute.

Our good ol' buddy Webster has easily defined the term.
Now, Allen and I hang out on a spaced schedule, the last time he was over when it was just him and myself was almost a month ago. So we usually have plenty to catch up on. I will stand in the middle of my kitchen, and he will sit at my bar and we will converse.
We have come with easy ways to spot modern day dirty girls.....body and mind.


First. Presentation.
Steer far away from a "strut", this is where she will walk at a medium speed pace and her footsteps will land one right in front of the other. This will cause a raising of one cheek, then the next step she takes will lower that cheek while raising the opposite. She may say that she walks like that because "that's how I walk". Bull. You want me, a horny sexually tensioned, hormone raising teenager to be attracted and possibly aroused by the motions of your bootay.


Second. Status/Texting Styles/Common Phrases.
In a ho, you will notice things she says or how she communicates slightly different form the usual female. If you do not have a Facebook, get off this blog. If you do, you have most likely seen the following status'.

1. "Life has it's ups and downs"

2. "Live Life!"

3. "I don't need men"

4. "Enjoy the ride"

5. "People Change"

6. "S**t Happens"

7. "Song of love"

8. "God is Love"

Translations:

1. "I had a good reputation, this ended recently by my actions and am now trying to make myself feel better."

2. "Since i will succeed no where in life, other than as an RN after college is over, i might as well party now"

3. "I liked a guy who screwed me over so i do away with men completely....this week."

4. This is just too easy.

5. "I know i have!"

6. "This term helps me think that this decision will not affect my life, seeing as my friends have done the same things it should be OK"(Ho's travel in packs)

7. "You play me a song, we have sex"

8. (This one is touchy, but true) "I acted out this weekend but everyone will see i have changed my ways if i add a Christian aspect to my next 40 status updates"

Texting:

"K"

"mhmm"

"yeah"

"whatever"

"Stop it, I'm ugly"(Hoping to God for a compliment about her looks)
"I'll be there"(And bails....the term is "Flake")

OK, last thing. here's how a girl Allen and I describe as a "Good Girl" would speak apposed to a "Dirty Girl".

"I don't know why she doesn't like me" = "I hate her, I heard she...(Insert rumors or lies here)"

"Did she really say that about me?" = "I'll beat her tail!"

"Hanging with friends" = "Greeeennnvviiiiillleee this weekend!"

Sincerely,

James